真好笑!我竟然把password弄不见!屌吧?
但,庆幸的是我竟然无意中给我找回我的password! 哈哈。。
终于可以继续blogging了。由于我太久没有玩部落格,所以我不大会edit了。。zz
所以我的部落格暂时还不会有很大的改变。待续....
Friday, March 27, 2009
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Why Chinese shouldn't have Christian Names?!
Confusing Chinese Names
Caller : Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan (anyone)?
Operator : Yes, you can speak to me.
Caller : No, I want to speak to Annie Wan (anyone)!
Operator : You are talking to someone! Who is this?
Caller : I'm Sam Wan (Someone). And I need to talk to Annie Wan (anyone)! It's urgent.
Operator : I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what's this urgent matter about?
Caller : Well... just tell my sister Annie Wan (anyone) that our brother Noel Wan (no one)has involved in an accident. Noel Wan (no one)got injured and now Noel Wan (no one) is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan (everyone) is on his way to the hospital.
Operator : Look if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don't have time for this!
Caller : You are so rude! Who are you?
Operator : I'm Saw Lee (Sorry).
Caller : Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!!!======================================================This is hilarious ...Why Chinese shouldn't have Christian names:
Anne Chang => Dirty (Mandarin)
Anne Chin => Keep Quiet (Mandarin)
Faye Chen => Dusty (Mandarin)
Carl Cheng => Buttock (Hokkien)
Monica Cheng => Touching your buttocks (Hokkien)
Lucy Leow => You are dead (Hokkien)
Jane Tan => Frying eggs (Mandarin)
Suzie Leow => Lose till death (Hokkien)
Henry Mah => Hate your mum (Mandarin)
Corrine Tai => Poor fellow (Hokkien)
Paul Chan => Bankrupt (Mandarin)
Nelson Tan => Bird laying eggs (Mandarin)
Leslie Tong => Rubbish Bin (Mandarin)
Carmen Teng => Leg hair long (Hokkien)
Connie Mah => Call your mother (Cantonese)
Danny See => Squeeze you to death (Hokkien)
Rosie Teng => Screws and nails (Hokkien)
Pete Tsai => Nose droppings (Hokkien)
Macy Koh => Never die before (Cantonese)
Caller : Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan (anyone)?
Operator : Yes, you can speak to me.
Caller : No, I want to speak to Annie Wan (anyone)!
Operator : You are talking to someone! Who is this?
Caller : I'm Sam Wan (Someone). And I need to talk to Annie Wan (anyone)! It's urgent.
Operator : I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what's this urgent matter about?
Caller : Well... just tell my sister Annie Wan (anyone) that our brother Noel Wan (no one)has involved in an accident. Noel Wan (no one)got injured and now Noel Wan (no one) is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan (everyone) is on his way to the hospital.
Operator : Look if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don't have time for this!
Caller : You are so rude! Who are you?
Operator : I'm Saw Lee (Sorry).
Caller : Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!!!======================================================This is hilarious ...Why Chinese shouldn't have Christian names:
Anne Chang => Dirty (Mandarin)
Anne Chin => Keep Quiet (Mandarin)
Faye Chen => Dusty (Mandarin)
Carl Cheng => Buttock (Hokkien)
Monica Cheng => Touching your buttocks (Hokkien)
Lucy Leow => You are dead (Hokkien)
Jane Tan => Frying eggs (Mandarin)
Suzie Leow => Lose till death (Hokkien)
Henry Mah => Hate your mum (Mandarin)
Corrine Tai => Poor fellow (Hokkien)
Paul Chan => Bankrupt (Mandarin)
Nelson Tan => Bird laying eggs (Mandarin)
Leslie Tong => Rubbish Bin (Mandarin)
Carmen Teng => Leg hair long (Hokkien)
Connie Mah => Call your mother (Cantonese)
Danny See => Squeeze you to death (Hokkien)
Rosie Teng => Screws and nails (Hokkien)
Pete Tsai => Nose droppings (Hokkien)
Macy Koh => Never die before (Cantonese)
笑一笑! 没烦恼~~^.^
1、“床前明月光”,下一句同学填“李白睡的香”…
2、“三个臭皮匠”下一句他竟然填“臭味都一样”…
3、陶渊明的“不为五斗米折腰”,那同学斗胆的写“给我六斗就可以”…
4、“穷则独善其身”,下一句同学填“富则妻妾成群”。
5、“后宫佳丽三千人”,下一句“铁棒也会磨成针”?
6、“但愿人长久”,下一句他填“一颗永流传”…还卖出广告来了…
7、“西塞山前白鹭飞”,下一句“东村河边乌龟爬”?
8、“天若有情天亦老”,下一句“人若有情死的早”?
9、“天生我材必有用”,有个天才同学竟然写“老鼠儿子会打洞”= =
10、“管中窥豹”,答曰“吓我一跳”。
11、“葡萄美酒夜光杯”,下一句“金钱美女一大堆”…
12、“想当年,金戈铁马”,下一句“看今朝,死缠烂打”…
13、“洛阳亲友如相问”,同学对“请你不要告诉他”…
14、“两情若是长久时”,同学对“该是两人结婚时”。
15、“书到用时方恨少”,同学对“钱到月底不够花”…
16、“人生自古谁无死”,同学填“有谁大便不带纸”…
17、后半句是“我以我血溅轩辕”,同学前面填了“他以他刀插我身”…
18、毛某人的词“红橙黄绿青蓝紫”,同学答曰=E
TEST FOR DEMENTIA ( 癡呆症)
下列有四個問題及一個加分題,你必須立刻回答,不能花時間慢慢想,讓我們看看你有多聰明。準備好,向下捲!
Below are four (4) questions and a bonus question. You have to answer them instantly. You can't take your time, answer all of them immediately. Let's find out just how clever you really are.
First Questi! on: 第一題 You are participating in a race. You overtake the second place person. What position are you in? 你參加賽跑,追過第 2 名,你是第幾名?
Answer: If you answered that you are first, then you are wrong! If you overtake the second place person, and you take their place, you are second! 解答: ! 如果你的回答是第 1 名,你就錯了!你如果追過第 2名,你只是取代那人的位置,你是第 2 名。
Second Question : 第二題 If you are in a race, and you overtake the last person, then you are? 你參加賽跑,你追過最後一名,你是第幾名?
Answer : If you answered that you are second to last, then you are wrong again. Tell me, how can you overtake the LAST person?! Yo! u're not having a good time at this! Are you? 解答: 如果你的回答是倒數第 2 名,你又錯了!告訴我,你怎能追過最後一名?顯然你並未樂在其中!
Third Question: ! 第三題Take 1000 and add 40 to it. Now add another 1000. Now add 30. Add another 1000. Now add 20. Now add another 1000. now add 10. What is the total? 以 1000 加上 40 ,再加 1000 ,再加 30 ,再加 1000 ,現在加上 20 ,再加一次 1000 ,現在加? W 10 ,總數是什麼?
Answer : Did you get 5000? The correct answer is actually 4100. Don't believe it? Check with your calculator! 解答: 得到 5000 是嗎?正確答案是 4100 ,不相信,用計算機查證吧!
Fourth Question: 第四題 Mary's father has five daughters: 1. Nana, 2. Nene, 3. Nini, 4. Nono. What is the name of the fifth daughter? Mary 的父親有 5 個女兒,第 1 個女兒 Nana , 第 2 個女兒 Nene , 第 3個女兒 Nini ,第 4 個女兒 Nono ,第 5 個女兒的名字是什麼?
Answer : Nunu? NO! Of course not. Her name i! s Mary. Read the question again! 解答: 答案是 Nunu 嗎?不!絕對不是,她的名字是 Mary ,請再讀一次問題!
Bonus Question 加分題 : There is a mute person who wants to buy a toothbrush. By imitating the action of brushing one's teeth he successfully expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is done. Now if there is a blind man who wishes to buy a pair of sunglasses, how should he express himself? 一個啞巴想買牙刷,他模仿刷牙的動作,成功的向店主表達,也完成了購買。現在如果一個瞎子想買一副太陽眼鏡,他要如何表達?
Answer : He just has to open his mouth and ask. He's blind, ! not mute - so simple. 解答: 他只要張開嘴問即可。他是瞎子,不是啞巴。就這麼簡單!
2、“三个臭皮匠”下一句他竟然填“臭味都一样”…
3、陶渊明的“不为五斗米折腰”,那同学斗胆的写“给我六斗就可以”…
4、“穷则独善其身”,下一句同学填“富则妻妾成群”。
5、“后宫佳丽三千人”,下一句“铁棒也会磨成针”?
6、“但愿人长久”,下一句他填“一颗永流传”…还卖出广告来了…
7、“西塞山前白鹭飞”,下一句“东村河边乌龟爬”?
8、“天若有情天亦老”,下一句“人若有情死的早”?
9、“天生我材必有用”,有个天才同学竟然写“老鼠儿子会打洞”= =
10、“管中窥豹”,答曰“吓我一跳”。
11、“葡萄美酒夜光杯”,下一句“金钱美女一大堆”…
12、“想当年,金戈铁马”,下一句“看今朝,死缠烂打”…
13、“洛阳亲友如相问”,同学对“请你不要告诉他”…
14、“两情若是长久时”,同学对“该是两人结婚时”。
15、“书到用时方恨少”,同学对“钱到月底不够花”…
16、“人生自古谁无死”,同学填“有谁大便不带纸”…
17、后半句是“我以我血溅轩辕”,同学前面填了“他以他刀插我身”…
18、毛某人的词“红橙黄绿青蓝紫”,同学答曰=E
TEST FOR DEMENTIA ( 癡呆症)
下列有四個問題及一個加分題,你必須立刻回答,不能花時間慢慢想,讓我們看看你有多聰明。準備好,向下捲!
Below are four (4) questions and a bonus question. You have to answer them instantly. You can't take your time, answer all of them immediately. Let's find out just how clever you really are.
First Questi! on: 第一題 You are participating in a race. You overtake the second place person. What position are you in? 你參加賽跑,追過第 2 名,你是第幾名?
Answer: If you answered that you are first, then you are wrong! If you overtake the second place person, and you take their place, you are second! 解答: ! 如果你的回答是第 1 名,你就錯了!你如果追過第 2名,你只是取代那人的位置,你是第 2 名。
Second Question : 第二題 If you are in a race, and you overtake the last person, then you are? 你參加賽跑,你追過最後一名,你是第幾名?
Answer : If you answered that you are second to last, then you are wrong again. Tell me, how can you overtake the LAST person?! Yo! u're not having a good time at this! Are you? 解答: 如果你的回答是倒數第 2 名,你又錯了!告訴我,你怎能追過最後一名?顯然你並未樂在其中!
Third Question: ! 第三題Take 1000 and add 40 to it. Now add another 1000. Now add 30. Add another 1000. Now add 20. Now add another 1000. now add 10. What is the total? 以 1000 加上 40 ,再加 1000 ,再加 30 ,再加 1000 ,現在加上 20 ,再加一次 1000 ,現在加? W 10 ,總數是什麼?
Answer : Did you get 5000? The correct answer is actually 4100. Don't believe it? Check with your calculator! 解答: 得到 5000 是嗎?正確答案是 4100 ,不相信,用計算機查證吧!
Fourth Question: 第四題 Mary's father has five daughters: 1. Nana, 2. Nene, 3. Nini, 4. Nono. What is the name of the fifth daughter? Mary 的父親有 5 個女兒,第 1 個女兒 Nana , 第 2 個女兒 Nene , 第 3個女兒 Nini ,第 4 個女兒 Nono ,第 5 個女兒的名字是什麼?
Answer : Nunu? NO! Of course not. Her name i! s Mary. Read the question again! 解答: 答案是 Nunu 嗎?不!絕對不是,她的名字是 Mary ,請再讀一次問題!
Bonus Question 加分題 : There is a mute person who wants to buy a toothbrush. By imitating the action of brushing one's teeth he successfully expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is done. Now if there is a blind man who wishes to buy a pair of sunglasses, how should he express himself? 一個啞巴想買牙刷,他模仿刷牙的動作,成功的向店主表達,也完成了購買。現在如果一個瞎子想買一副太陽眼鏡,他要如何表達?
Answer : He just has to open his mouth and ask. He's blind, ! not mute - so simple. 解答: 他只要張開嘴問即可。他是瞎子,不是啞巴。就這麼簡單!
养狗还是养蚊子
选宠物的时候,是选狗还是选蚊子呢?还是选蚊子吧,理由如下:
1. 养狗要买狗粮,养蚊子只要卷起裤管就行了
2. 养狗要打扫狗尿狗屎,养蚊子就没有这方面的忧愁
3.你养的狗咬了邻居,要赔好多钱;而你养的蚊子咬了居,邻居一句话都不会有
4.养狗要经常出去溜狗;却没见过谁在蚊子脖子里拴一条绳子出去溜蚊子
5. 狗要买回来,蚊子打开窗户就会自己飞进来
6. 狗要花钱打狂犬疫苗,蚊子不要打狂蚊子疫苗
7.朋友看到你的狗长得可爱,会千方百计把它要走;但不会要走你的可爱的蚊子
8.你抱着狗在阳台晒太阳,可能不小心把你的狗从阳台上掉下去摔死;但是,从没听说过哪只蚊子是摔死的
9.让朋友惊呼“我从没见过这么大的狗”要比“我从没见过这么大的蚊子”要困难的多
10. 你要专门为狗准备狗窝,而蚊子就不必
11.当家里有你不欢迎的朋友的时候,你的狗帮忙赶他,你还得喝斥它;而蚊子帮你赶走他的话,你不用喝斥蚊子
12. 你不能同时养猫和狗,猫和狗会打架;蚊子和猫就不会打架
13.你不小心踩了你的狗,你的狗会大叫;而你把你的蚊子踩扁它都不会叫一声。
1. 养狗要买狗粮,养蚊子只要卷起裤管就行了
2. 养狗要打扫狗尿狗屎,养蚊子就没有这方面的忧愁
3.你养的狗咬了邻居,要赔好多钱;而你养的蚊子咬了居,邻居一句话都不会有
4.养狗要经常出去溜狗;却没见过谁在蚊子脖子里拴一条绳子出去溜蚊子
5. 狗要买回来,蚊子打开窗户就会自己飞进来
6. 狗要花钱打狂犬疫苗,蚊子不要打狂蚊子疫苗
7.朋友看到你的狗长得可爱,会千方百计把它要走;但不会要走你的可爱的蚊子
8.你抱着狗在阳台晒太阳,可能不小心把你的狗从阳台上掉下去摔死;但是,从没听说过哪只蚊子是摔死的
9.让朋友惊呼“我从没见过这么大的狗”要比“我从没见过这么大的蚊子”要困难的多
10. 你要专门为狗准备狗窝,而蚊子就不必
11.当家里有你不欢迎的朋友的时候,你的狗帮忙赶他,你还得喝斥它;而蚊子帮你赶走他的话,你不用喝斥蚊子
12. 你不能同时养猫和狗,猫和狗会打架;蚊子和猫就不会打架
13.你不小心踩了你的狗,你的狗会大叫;而你把你的蚊子踩扁它都不会叫一声。
猪的笑话
一男养一猪,特烦它,就想把它给扔了,但是此猪认得回家的路,扔了好多次都没有成功。某日,此人驾车弃猪,当晚打电话给他的妻子问:“猪归否?”其妻曰:“归矣。”男非常气愤,大吼道:“快让它接电话,我迷路了。”
讲笑话
一群动物遇到了海难, 乘着小船在海上漂流。食物快吃完了,它们决定通过游戏把一些同伴抛下去。规则是轮流讲笑话。要是谁的笑话不能使所有的动物都发笑,那它就要倒霉。 牛先讲。牛的笑话非常精彩,几乎每个动物都笑了,但猪没有笑。于是牛被扔下了海。然后轮到羊。羊的笑话非常糟糕。没有谁能笑出来。可猪却扑哧笑出了声。 "你为什么要笑?"动物们纳闷地问。 "对不起,我想起牛的笑话了。"猪慢吞吞地回答。
聪明的鹦鹉
妓院里生活着一只聪明的鹦鹉,可是,由于妓院经营不佳倒闭了,这只鹦鹉被卖给了一个小孩。 小孩拎着鸟笼刚一进家门,鹦鹉便叫道: “嗯?搬家啦!” 这时,小孩的妈妈走了过来,鹦鹉又叫道: “嗯?老板也换啦!” 当小孩的姐姐走过来时,鹦鹉叫道: “哦?小姐也换啦!” 当鹦鹉看见小孩的爸爸时,又叫道: “嗯,还是老客户!”
三只乌龟
三只乌龟来到一家饭馆,要了三份蛋糕。东西刚端上桌,他们发现都没带钱。 大乌龟说:我最大,当然不用回去取钱。 中乌龟说:派小乌龟去最合适。 小乌龟说:我可以回去取钱,但是我走之后,你们谁也不准动我的蛋糕!大乌龟和中乌龟满口答应,小乌龟走了。 因为腹中空空,大中乌龟很快将自己的那份蛋糕吃完了。可是,小乌龟迟迟不见踪影。第三天,大中龟实在饿极了,不约而同地说:咱们还是把小龟的那份吃了罢。 正当他们要动手吃时,隔壁传来小乌龟的声音:“如果你们敢动我的蛋糕,我就不回去取钱了!”
Just For Laugh!
Teacher : Sam how old is your father?
Sam : As old as me.
Teacher : ???How can that be?
Sam : He became a father only when I was born!
Teacher : ......
Ahmad : Lim where were you born?
Lim : Singapore.
Ahmad : Which part?
Lim : All of me...
Ahmad : !?!
A boy came home from school with his exam results.
Mom : What did you get?
Tan : My marks are under water.
Mom : What do you mean 'under water'?
Tan : They are all below C(sea) level...
Funny??pls leave ur comment...ty^^
Sam : As old as me.
Teacher : ???How can that be?
Sam : He became a father only when I was born!
Teacher : ......
Ahmad : Lim where were you born?
Lim : Singapore.
Ahmad : Which part?
Lim : All of me...
Ahmad : !?!
A boy came home from school with his exam results.
Mom : What did you get?
Tan : My marks are under water.
Mom : What do you mean 'under water'?
Tan : They are all below C(sea) level...
Funny??pls leave ur comment...ty^^





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